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Christians Struggling Against Homosexual Feelings

Many Christians are struggling with homosexual feelings. They are struggling in silence because they are afraid to share their feelings. They are afraid they will be misunderstood, rejected, hated and even cast out of Christian fellowship. There is a desperate need to minister to these people, because allowing them to share their feelings can help to lighten their burden and strengthen them to handle and cope with their feelings in a positive Christian manner.

Minister by becoming known as a person who listens, loves, does not judge, gossip, condemn, etc. by the things you say and do. Those struggling against homosexuality will be more likely to come to you. Share God's and your love and forgiveness freely (love the sinner), but, do not neglect to strengthen yourself with wisdom and strength from Godís Word to share the truth about homosexuality in love (hate the sin). As people struggling against homosexuality are able to share their feelings with you, their burden becomes lighter. Hold them accountable for their sexual behavior. If they fall into sin sit down with them to confess their sin before God and you. Help them plan ways to stay away from temptation. Help them pray for strength. Pray that they will not be lead into temptation. Read the Bible with them. Do anything you can to keep them close to God and strengthened by His Word. Seek out additional help and resources to help you and them.

Moral People with Homosexual Feelings

Some people who have homosexual feelings are highly moral and even religious. They believe God created them to be homosexual. To live any other way would go against God's will for their lives. For them the Old Testament, which strictly forbids the practice of homosexuality, is overruled by the New Testament in which they believe Christ does away with all the old rules by declaring everyone is saved by faith, not by the law (old rules). They believe that the New Testament condemns only those homosexuals who are perverse or offending (1 Corinthians 6:9 ďhomosexual offenders"). Moral people with homosexual feelings believe they are neither perverse nor offending. They believe in monogamous committed relationships that can break down and end in divorce, just as heterosexual marriages do. They depend on God's unconditional love to forgive them for the breakdown and separation of their relationships, but not for the homosexual relationship.

Because of what they believe, moral homosexuals live in a state of rebellion against Godís condemnation of homosexuality. They do not understand that their rebellion and homosexuality offend God and that in so doing they become the homosexual offender named in 1 Corinthians 6:9. Nor do they realize that by disobeying God they show their lack of love for God (John 14:15). Their lack of faith is evident in what they do, their rebellion and sin(James 2:17).They are the most likely to be accepted by the world when they "come out of the closet (reveal they are homosexual)" because the world sees them as good. They are good. Their moral "religion" demands it. Sadly, their sin and rebellion separates them from God and salvation.

Minister by sitting back and listening for a long time, and even over the course of time. Do not comment, attempt to refute or in any way condemn what the moral person with homosexual feelings shares with you. Only listen. This will be difficult, but, you must simply and only listen. Wait patiently for the right opportunity to speak.

- After much has been shared by the moral person with homosexual feelings about what he or she believes and feels, ask to share what you believe. It is very likely you will be allowed to do so, because this would be good and morally right. Assure the moral person with homosexual feelings that you fully understand that he or she may not agree, but that you hope he or she will listen as intently as you have listened and not condemned how you feel or what you believe, because you did not condemn what the person feels or believes. In effect, you have set the person up to listen to you.

- Explain that your understanding of homosexuality comes from what you have read in both the Old and New Testament because you believe what Godís Word says, Christ came to fulfill, not abolish the Law (Matthew 5:17). Emphasize how important it is to have God's Law (Old Testament) and Gospel(New Testament) in your faith and life, to show you your sin and your Savior. Share how much you need the whole Word of God (Old and New Testament) to know and do God's will.

- Before you speak study and know the passages below to back up what you share and believe with Godís own Word: From the beginning God created male and female (Genesis 1:27) to increase in number (sex) (Genesis 1:28). He created woman for man (Genesis 2:22-23) for marriage (Genesis 2:24) - Old and New Testament condemnations of homosexuality (Genesis 19:5; Jude 7; Leviticus 18:22; Judges 19:22; Romans 1:25-26; I Corinthians 6:9-11) .- Faith saves, but God's Law leads us to Christ to be saved (Galatians 3:24). Share how important obedience to God is, not to save us, but as evidence of our faith in and love for God.

- Never try to convince, rather, merely state that while you respect, like and even love the person (the sinner), you have searched the Scriptures and Godís Word has proven to you, over and over again, that the practice (the sin) of homosexuality is wrong. This process assures that you are making your judgements based on Godís Word, not your own knowledge or personal feelings about homosexuality. Sharing Godís Word, not your own, places the person directly in Godís hands, because only God, through the power of His Word, can change this person.

People Who Find Their Identity in Homosexuality

These are people who have spent their life struggling to find their identity and sadly have found it in homosexuality. Homosexuality is their identity - who they are - what they believe. Homosexuality is their "religion" - their reason for existence and purpose in life. They are convinced they are on this earth to both be and glorify homosexuality and that this is a good and noble purpose.

People who find their identity in homosexuality will follow high moral standards, as long as these do not take away their sexual freedom. They promote safe and responsible homosexual behavior, but not necessarily monogamous relationships. They fight for homosexual rights and search for more knowledge and understanding of homosexuality. They are not always accepted because they can be radical in their demands for their acceptance and rights. They can be severely defensive, lash out harshly with rebuttals and may even become dangerous in their fight to maintain their identity. They can hate those who oppose them, because they are in a fight for their identity (life).

Do not attempt to refute people who have found their identity in homosexuality with Godís Word. Instead, minister to them by being a kind and caring Christian friend. Before people who find their identity in homosexuality can give up homosexuality they need to find their true identity, which is in Christ (Mark 8:35). That is why it is important that you not share you faith in words, rather, live your faith in actions. Faith needs to be blocked out by people who find their identity in homosexuality. Faith does not allow them to practice homosexuality and if they cannot be homosexual they cannot be anybody at all - they lose their identity. This is frightening. Hence, we can understand their zealous aggressive behavior to remain homosexual.

The key to ministry to people who find their identity in homosexuality is letting them see Christ in you; that you are free in Christ (John 8:36); that you are rich in Christ (Philippians 4:19) and that you bear no prejudice (Acts 10:34). Your prayers and God working through you will make more of a difference than anything you can do for or say to people caught up in this type of homosexuality. (James 5:15). When people who find their identity in homosexuality come to see Christ in you and desire Christ in their lives, Christ will come to them and give them a new identity in and through His love.

People Who Are Obsessed With Homosexuality

Obsession with sex, of course, is an illness which can be present in homosexual and heterosexual people alike. This type of obsession occurs when or because people lose control of their sexual desires. Most want to stop having sex, but find they can't. They are addicted. They experience guilt and remorse, but they will continue to place themselves and others in danger by knowingly passing on sexually transmitted diseases and death. The homosexual community pities them, but asks them to leave their bars and bath houses. They cannot believe God's forgiveness, love and salvation is meant for them. They feel unworthy of God's help and deeply unlovable.

Ministry to people obsessed with homosexuality needs to be one of sharing God's love for all people. Help them confess their sins and assure them of Godís forgiveness, over and over again (Matthew 18:22) until Godís love and forgiveness is understood and accepted. Keep in mind that this understanding can take years. Pouring God's love and forgiveness on people obsessed with homosexuality frees them from the guilt and remorse that traps them in homosexuality. Ministry requires constantly assuring people obsessed with homosexuality that God loves them, forgives them, desires to help them and will give them His strength. This constant assurance will help them trust God; feel worthy of God's grace and realize self-control is possible, but, only with God's help and strength.

If people obsessed with homosexuality are rebellious against God and refuse to confess and be forgiven, befriend them as long as possible. If, indeed, it comes to a point when they refuse to listen or be helped then you must brush the dust off your feet and leave them totally in Godís hands. You cannot minister to blatant rebellion against God. You can continue to pray for them, asking God to help them.

People Who Have Become Perverted By Homosexuality

This type of sexual perversion is also present in heterosexuals. This type of homosexuality occurs when the sin of homosexuality has taken over the soul. It is extremely difficult and even impossible to cure people perverted by homosexual and heterosexual sex. These people will obtain sex at any cost. They lack guilt or remorse. They will rape, molest and murder for sex. They are totally rejected by the homosexual community. They need intensive psychological and sexual counseling. They cannot love anyone including God. They believe they can never be saved.

Ministry to people perverted by homosexuality is basically needs to be a prayer ministry. Few people are qualified to help or give counsel to these people and few counselors are successful. Certainly telling people perverted by homosexuality that Christ came for sinners (Mark 2:17); Jesus knows our weaknesses (Hebrews 4:15) and that God desires all people to be saved (Romans 8:37) is encouraged and may be the only hope these people receive


This resource is provided by Family Crossfires, Inc. Ministries for a donation to help reunite and strengthen generations.You may assist this ministry in it's critical mission by sending a donation every time this UIM Resources is used to: Family Crossfires, Inc. Ministries, W9318 Oak Ave. Shawano, WI 54166-6239

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